Roswell - Off. The fricking. Map.
Off The Menu: These people need to DIE. The preternatural level of patience djb has displayed in dealing with this passel of halfwits and nimrods and morons for two seasons qualifies him for sainthood....
View ArticleRoswell - Departure...as if
The Departure: Wait a sec. This is what a SHORTENED season feels like?
View ArticleRoswell - Bring 'Em Young
Busted: If you thought New Mexico sucked, ladies and gentlemen...Utah.
View ArticleRoswell - The best stuff is just so not in here
Michael, The Guys And The Great Snapple Caper: ANYBODY WANT A SNAPPLE? ANYBODY? ANYBODY? HUH? Mmmmmm...SNAPPLE!!!
View ArticleRoswell - Roswell 101
Significant Others: Pamie tries to figure out the entire history of this show from only one episode. It's that easy!
View ArticleRoswell - L.A. Story
Secrets And Lies (1): Aliens act badly (hell, everyone acts badly) as Roswell goes totally Hollywood and repels yet another first-time viewer.
View ArticleRoswell - Out of control
Control (2): Roswell continues its slide down the slippery slope of quality as Max's quest for his son sputters to a halt, Isabel barrels ahead with her wedding plans, and everyone else wonders what...
View ArticleRoswell - It was a teenage wedding and the old folks wished 'em well
To Have And To Hold: Actually, the old folks didn't wish them anything. Nobody wanted to go. Nobody cared. Don't we know just exactly how they felt?
View ArticleRoswell - Too many khooks in the khitchen
Interruptus: Khivar goes by many names in this episode. Call him what you like, but don't call him late for a field trip back to the Planet Arium. Don't worry about him, though. He's brought his own...
View ArticleRoswell - Her boyfriend's back and he's gonna be in trouble
Behind The Music: Hey-blah, hey-blah, her boyfriend's back.
View ArticleRoswell - There's Something About Sammy
Samuel Rising: What'd you say? Oh. Nothing. Never mind.
View ArticleRoswell - I Wonder Tangentially About Jeannie
I Married An Alien: Because "Blast From The Ass" wouldn't have made it as the title of the index page blurb, now, would it?
View ArticleRoswell - Death Becomes Them
Panacea: All of them, really. The cast is prettied up considerably when one of its regulars and one of its extras die in an untimely fashion. Also, Maria shoots her music career pretty much right in...
View ArticleRoswell - Shut up...mon
Chant Down Babylon: Roswell takes almost forty-five full minutes to finally explain why it was digging up Bob Marley for the previous forty-five minutes.
View ArticleRoswell - Countdown to Ecstasy
Who Died And Made You King?: Three left, people. Episodes, that is. And also viewers.
View ArticleRoswell - Countdown to Ecstasy II: Nearly-Cancelled Boogaloo
Crash: Two left, people. Episodes, that is. And also viewers.
View ArticleRoswell - Countdown to Ecstasy III: Rise of the Machines
Four Aliens And A Baby: One left, people. Episode, that is. And also viewer.
View ArticleRoswell - Actually, it was pretty stupid
Graduation: Michael and Maria refer to this show as stupid, taking the final word from the critics who have been spray-painting that word on the side of Roswell's Paramount soundstage for three...
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